Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Vancouver Kids Sports Enthusiast Tests Positive For PED

In news that shocked the Vancouver kids sports world, it was revealed today that local father of four and kids sports all star Kent Livingston has tested positive for performance enhancing drugs. Livingston, however denies he has ever knowingly used any PEDs and would not comment on what drug he is being accused of taking. However, according to sources, the substance found in the sample was a indeed a synthetic steroid.

Asked to explain how he tested positive, Livingston quipped: “I don’t know, maybe someone slipped me a Mickey.” In fact, Livingston claimed no knowledge of the test or how, or why, he would have even been tested. He blamed the media and claimed that: “It’s just another witch hunt by you reporters.” He then wondered out loud how someone had even gained a sample from him in the first place. “Maybe someone is out to get me. Who knows, maybe it was A-Rod or Manny trying to get the heat off of them?”

As for his wife and four kids they are standing by Livingston, offering this statement through the family’s attorney: “We love Kent and we believe him. He would never do anything like this.” A close friend, who chose to remain anonymous, also stood by Livingston, saying: “Just look at the guy. He’s not exactly a He-man.”

Time will tell how this turns out, but at this time Livingston is staying out of the public eye and just trying to put the pieces back together as three of his four kids gear up for their latest sports seasons, next month.

Ok, so it’s true I’m on roids, but it was just a one-time thing. I’ve had a bad shoulder for over a year and I feared the worst, so I kept putting off seeing the doctor. I finally went and the good news is that he doesn’t think I have a torn rotator cuff and he didn’t think I even needed an MRI. That was great news, because that would have been very spendy. However, they did give me a shot of steroids directly into my shoulder, kind of like a Cortisone shot. That was extremely painful, but it’s been about five days now and my shoulder is actually starting to feel better. So, even though I couldn’t pass a PED test, my shoulder feels better than it has in over a year.

As for the family, Tyler is in the middle of his basketball season and they are 0-4. There have been two blowouts and two close ones (38-36, 27-26). They are improving though and hopefully we can pick up a “W” before the season is over. He and Bailey both start baseball in June and Trevin is going to take some kids sports classes, which start in two weeks. We will have a busy summer of sports. As for Caden, he is playing baseball with us here at the house more and more, and likes it quite a bit. He can already throw a ball in the air to himself and hit it with the bat. Not bad for a 2-year-old.Bailey turned 6 on Sunday. She got a new bike and several things for drawing, which she absolutely loves to do.The three boys and I went to “Dozer Day” while Bailey had her party and let’s just say it was a learning experience for me. If we are lucky enough to receive free passes again (thanks Jerry), we will do things a lot differently. First of all, I will take some neighbor kids who would actually like to go, instead of my own. But that’s enough on that.
Carol is getting closer all the time to adding one more reason why I won’t sleep well at night, to our home, but we are getting excited. It’s like only 6 and half weeks away now. So that’s a brief wrap on what’s happening with us. There a few funnies below, but either the kids haven’t been as funny lately, or I haven’t been very motivated to write it down. Knowing them, it’s probably the latter. But these are pretty good, plus there’s another one from a half-asleep Carol, so enjoy…

Trevin has a pair of shorts he received from a cousin. They are still a little big but he likes to wear them anyways. They have a really long string on them to tighten the waist, and Trevin has often been found putting the string over his head, and he even had it behind his neck once. So we have told him not to do that because of obvious reasons. So one day, he was doing it again and I told him: “Trevin, don’t put that on your head anymore, or I’m going to cut it off.” He replies: “No, don’t cut off my head.”

Bailey is probably infamous by now on this blog for her gas power. So, on her birthday (May 17th) she is at the table and the kids are about to have dessert. Carol was at the piano playing “name that tune” with them and played “I Love to See the Temple.” Bailey guessed right away, and then did what Bailey always does at the table. Literally, it is like clockwork with her at the dinner table. So I said, “You love to toot. That’s what you love.” She said: “Yeah, but now I’m only gonna do it on special days.” I inquired further and she said: “Like Christmas…well not Christmas because everyone will be there. But like on birthdays when no one else is there, just you guys.” At least she has a little shame left.

Caden has been subjected to potty humor for much of his young life, and he, well, has grown to like it. He cracks himself up often, just by saying: “pee pee or poo poo.” He was humoring himself the other day and Carol said: “Oh Caden, he sure has inherited a liking for potty humor,” not really aware that he was even paying attention. But he retorted very assuredly: “No I didn’t.”

Trevin approached Carol the other day and asked: “Mom, can we have twins?” Carol responded, “No, there’s just one in there.” Then Trevin replied, while pointing to her chest: “But those are getting bigger, too.” Kids are just too observant.

So Carol and I are in bed and she is apparently half asleep again. I was tickling her and she said “go do that somewhere else.” So I got even closer and she said you better not. I said: “Well you said somewhere else.” Again, I thought she was awake, but she lifts her arm, points over across the room and says: “Go do that over by the cars and trucks.” I said: “Did you hear what you just said?” She laughed and claimed she was dreaming about cars because of we are in need of a new van. She is obsessed with it, so supposedly she was thinking about that. Anyways, another good laugh for me right before I went to sleep.

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